never have i ever had a craving for dick this badly
I forgot how hot balto sounded
Just cleaned up my puke with my lecture notes.
I love how I just got my coachella ticket and ecstasy in a package deal.
when my professor asked "does anyone know what streches across south america" and a kid in the back row said "my exgirfriends vagina" i knew i was at home.
I want an alcoholic time machine so we could skip to new years eve
This is amazing. I can pinpoint the window in time that you lost all sanity.
Be subtle and tell lucas that he should sleep here tonight. And by subtle, i mean show him this text...
We haven't even eaten dinner yet and she's already been asked to "take it down a notch" by the groom's mom.
Three Asian guys got on the elevator with a handle of Hennessey and a sleeping bag. This is not the start of a joke.
I got inside last night via doggy door
He held my hand in public and I nearly came. Like he needs to be inside of me yesterday.
Ick. That's not even the fun kind of punishment.
I guess you could say that.. I mean, we did walk in on our DD doing a keg stand thru her ass.
he's single and there are thong briefs.
Randomize
