cab driver gave us mini bottles of jd for the ride home & proceeded to run every red light. wonder how many bottles he drank.
32 messages asking me to suck his dick. And there for a minute i thought i was desperate. ha!
Hahahaha
make that 40.
Still drunk and leading the team through the 9am sales meeting. I'm pretty sure this is why there aren't more 26year-olds in management.
Can you please check on Jay? He just called and left a Backstreet Boys song on my voicemail. Either it's 1998, or someone needs to go back to rehab.
You're always adorable, but when you're drunk, you're like Chia Pet adorable.
Yea. I couldn't get a job in fast food but I can teach Americas youth. The future looks great
I've heard awesome things about their margaritas. I also may buy a mustache from party city. Would you do me with a mustache on??! Hahahaha. But, really.
Woke up fully clothed in bed sleeping on my purse.....we're back!!!
Not only is he in the circus, the man survived a near death experience and has an accent. She might as well have found a unicorn. This shit just doesn't happen in real life. Where did she meet this magical creature?
Because everyone is allowed one half drunken 7:30 am walk back to campus in a cowgirl costume, right?
there is nothing ok with the fact that that was the 4th time i peed in the same parking ramp
Don't do it. He's got a dick the size of a baseball bat. You don't want that commitment.
I have to. For the sake of science.
What are you talking about? Keg stands at wedding are super classy.
Its pretty bad when you can tell twins apart by the size of their penises...
Don’t get me wrong—I love silver and bracelets—but handcuffs are not a good look on me…
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