He yelled GOOOOAAAALLL when he came.
She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
He told me they were just razor bumps!
I think call of duty has replaced my masturbating. And I'm alright with that.
Pretty sure a homeless guy just told me to 'lick his balls clean' because I looked at him.
it was pretty much a given that i would lose my thong on dollar tequilla shot night
im drinking italian dressing and watching dexter. its 230am. lets never drink on sundays again.
You broke into someone's house and stole a pan of lasagna.
I might have to break the "you stay out of my sister and ill stay out of yours" pact that i have with tim
We're gona eat taco bell and then take exlax and see who can hold it in the longest. Loser has to pay for drinks all weekend. You in?
Sex-sore abs and my workout pants have gravel stains on the knees. It's like the workout of shame.
On Wednesday I'm putting wine in a water bottle and crashing Margaret thatchers funeral
Let us ponder on the good times. Ya know when the Jonas brothers were incapable of growing facial hair and I didn't fully understand what a dick looks like
Most of my life can be described like an HBO prison drama.
Just wanted to share my unfortunate vagina news in the hopes that it would make your vagina feel better about itself.
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