So he asked me last night if I would cheer him on while he masturbated...
don't you miss freshman year when you could get away with "but i've never given a bj before..."
so exactly how many freshman chicks did i tell to call me "the tripod"?
Both he AND his 17 year old son were hitting on me... I'm bridging generational gaps
dude. you ripped the mardi gras beads off the girls neck and yelled she didnt deserve them..
we bought a duck. we're keeping him in our dorm room. don't ever try to tell me you've had a better freshman year than me.
Dude, I fucked her last night with nothing but my bandana on. Like straight Indian chief style.
you reached into a lemon drop to pull out a lemon of someone else's drink..
I'll keep you from getting pregnant and you keep my papers gramaticallly correct
YES please come visit. Lets go get belligerent. I won't even pepperspray you
Now accepting any stories about my adventures last night, in particular why my knuckles are bleeding.
So I sent him a snap of me half naked holding a pie last night.
Oh yeah I meant to tell you the Tomb Raider looking girl so crop dusted me on the stairway
Not to be gross and awkward, but I just had sex outside in the rain on the hood of a lexus
Now that I'm sober I feel the need to tell you that I'm not really a fish whisperer....
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