I hate all girls vehemently.
So I'm cool with the whole break up, but it sure is a shame we didn't get to use those handcuffs.
Just saw actual Chinese people doing a Chinese firedrill. Good day.
We can get Dustin to help us. I think he'd be good at luring girls into a dark alley.
she thought don quixote was a type of tequila.
you went around the entire night in your french maid costume dusting off the "cob webs" on everyone's crotch saying "you havent gotten any action in a while"
I was wondering why i got so many friend requests the next day...
Although I love the reason it was done, can you maybe not show pictures of my dick to all your friends at parties? I like to present my penis in my own special way. thanks
Should I tell him the real reason I was in the hospital, or should I just keep him thinking the side effect he thought was in for was allergy related, not I just miscarried the child I didn't know we were having?
I pull out like 90% of the time, but that's just to make art.
she asked him to cuddle cuz she was cold and instead he got up, moved the space heater to her side of the bed, and went back to sleep
Are you doing trivia tonite? Also sorry I peed on you.
Okay Im still jerking off but now with the Reality of Law School Looming In The Distance
I'm trying to get weird tonight. Like I want to see bitches crawling on all fours drinking milk from bowls and shit by 5 am. You down?
Walking into my bedroom & smelling stale sex & disappointment isn't how I envisioned being 39, in case you were wondering.
Don't mind me, I'm just walking 2 miles across campus with no jacket, covered in highlighter, and carrying a hair extension. Gotta love miami!
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