just as he was about to cum he started shouting "I THINK I CAN! I THINK I CAN!" over and over again.
It's nice to sit in the library and see the progression from freshman pledge to 6th year coke addict all at one table. Gotta love sororities
You don't even know the meaning of faking an orgasm until you sleep with an uncircumcised ginger.
my dad just told me he wants a furry wall in the house... i'm proud and concerned
I've learned something. I regret way too may Tuesdays in my life to be normal
well I was pissed. first he yelled at me for having my own condoms, then he got mad when they didn't fit him. Dude, I only fuck magnum men.
Just ate a chocolate chip cookie upside down. This is what having a degree does for you.
Well. No wine. And no real mixers. I'm using vodka and grape juice and calling it Slurrrlot. Happy Holidays bitch.
I was mid hand job and stopped me because he wanted to "connect" which meant putting his thumb in between my eyebrows and a hand over my heart and closing our eyes...
Things I have learnt this week: bubble mix is toxic. Extremely toxic.
Christopher Columbus didn't sail the ocean blue so I would have to go to class and not have sex with my boyfriend
I am drinking fireball and apple juice out of a sippy cup like a fucking toddler.
Just spent the morning washing Bailey's and Guiness out of my clothes -_-
I really don’t want to have kids.
I thought we agreed we were done with dirty talk for the day
If history is any guide, his morals are no match for my tits
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