When she said "surprise me" I'm positive she didn't mean "bang my roommate"
Prob not but she was surprised
OH RELAX, IT WAS PITY SEX.....
There is somethin about your sexuality that makes my dick do jumping jacks when I see you
i wanna stay in my bed and fart for a few more hours
just saw a girl with a lower back tattoo of the boondock saints prayer.. i will marry her
Packed at 6 am completely wasted. Damage assessment: 12 pairs of socks (no underwear), a flashlight, 3 shorts, shot glass, 8 sweaters, puff paint, one sneaker.
we turned studying into a drinking game, she drinks when she gets it right, i drink when she gets it wrong. so we'll be out soon
is the shake weight an appropriate valentine's day present?
I wish I could attach your penis to someone I like more than you.
She says I'm cute and I remind her of her brother. She's too hot to back out now. I don't know. I'm guna go for it.
Dude just read our convo. Apparently I was talking to you while I was naked. She wasn't happy about it.
The fact that she put a frat guy in check tells me I did some good raising my little sister. Time to see if she does keg stands.
I never thought I would be having sex behind a shower curtain that wasn't in a bathroom.
I did the walk of shame this morning and his mom hugged me in the driveway
I did a kegel this morning to determine if I had been penetrated during last night's blackout. Nope.
Randomize
