C thinks vomiting on the batroom floor = reaon not to party. Lies. Party continues.
he only lasted three minutes, so to spite him i stayed the night and slept in.
Well, shes famous, an alcoholic, hillarious, and has big boobs.... Pretty much my only aspirations in life.
I didn't think her British accent was real until I saw how fucked up her teeth were.
hooking up with my manager sounds like an even better idea while i'm sober.
just shottied a beer can with a pumpkin carver. i love October.
I saw a stripper quit while on stage to months ago nothing you tell me will amaze me
I drank entirely too much. My skin hurts to wear
Stolen hampster on my tits. Don't tell me I don't know how to party.
Let me stew on this while im plucking my nipple hairs and showering.
Highlight of the night was you walking into the men's room yelling "My husband is diabetic" and crawling under the stall to yell at me.
Day 1 of "Death of a Liver" weekend complete. It came with flashbacks of horrible mistakes I made due to alcohol. I'm excited for how Sunday is going to turn out.
I've found a new low. I was climb-on-the-bar-piano drunk.
I DONT HAVE THE SOCIAL SKILLS TO EXPLAIN THAT YOU DIED EATING MY PUSSY
Pretty sure I'm partying in a onesie right now.
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