To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
I almost took home a boy from the bar last night, till i realized he was not speaking drunk, he was from another country and didnt know english. that could have been an awkward morning.
dollar beers will do that to you.
is it sad that i can masturbate and get my big O just from thinking about a Tiffany engagement ring?
pray for me tomorrow cause I have a midterm that I've mostly studied for by watching Bill Nye episodes on the subject...
I'm drunk and I'm watching it's Alwyas Sunny and eating candy. Even I am jealosu of my life
Don't pass out before midnight like you did last year. See how much your year sucked
We need to buy some popsicles so we can remind ourselves we're good at this.
I need to figure out how to tell my doctor that I don't want to fix my possible fertility problems until AFTER I'm done whoring around in my 20s.
not saying it was a bad idea to throw an impromptu party but someone stole the microwave
Like lay upon bear skin rugs, drink brandy and reminisce of the yesteryear's before a majestic fire place? Because those are my plans.
How exactly do I approach the whole "Well that was fun. Am I purchasing the Plan B or you?" topic?
Im at that shitty point in my day where I start planning night activities while finger dipping vyvance off of my desk, you got any plans?
I'm so glad we both made out with him though. I feel like that really brought us together
MY FUCKING CAT JUST GAVE BIRTH AND IM FUCKING STONED AND I FUCKING DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO!!!
I'm going to start charging you rent if you keep leaving your random conquests on my living room couch the morning after
Randomize
