wait, do i give off the impression that i DON'T want girls to show me their boobs if i video chat with them?
how many princess gummy vitamins will it take to negate last nights drinking binge?
We just made mixed drinks in the bathroom of burger king. This is sad.
There was an audience eating triscuts and bananas in the bathroom while watching him puke. It was a good birthday.
I hope he doesn't find the chex mix when he takes my shirt off.
Just gave some kid head in the library. Perfect way to end the semester.
Well, I want to see you regardless of whether or not you will lick whipped cream off my body.
I was high fiving everyone. I even high fived with the wall for doing such a good job suporting the ceiling and keeping us alive.
I just gagged from thinking about the amount of tequila we will be drinking. DRUNK TUESDAYS
I sent him a picture of my boobs instead of saying good morning. I'm trying to tell him how I feel in a language he'll understand.
After sex he cried I didn't know what to do so I patted him on the back and went to the kitchen to make waffles
what better to celebrate not being pregnant than to eat a bowl full of rum soaked pineapples?
I still can't believe a guy pooped in my backyard
OMG I DIDNT READ THAT TEXT CAREFULLY CAUSE I'M ON THE DEVILS LETTUCE & I THREATENED TO PUNCH A CHILD OMG I'M SO SORRY
Im so unlucky if I fell in a barrel of dicks, I'd come our sucking my thumb
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