I'm just sayin. Is it sad that I spent my last dollar on a hamburger just to get a paper bag to huff out of?
Just watched my manager erase "we've been 2 days wo an accident" and change it to "0" these ppl are too high.
i went through the entire semester and only just now realized there's a girl in my history class that i've hooked up with.
Just when I thought this night couldn't get any worse, my dad sang and dedicated Sexual Healing to me at kareoke night.
I just ate four packages of Swiss Rolls. Being high and on food stamps is AHmazing.
I demand visitation hours with the duck.
The last party at your house was a sex toy party...it's an obvious transition to baby shower
Tomorrow is Have Sex and Climb A Mountain Day. We have amazing dates.
I just heard a 350 lb guy with a stutter describe getting blood in his eye as he was shanking his cellmate and, more generally, how to survive as a white guy in jail.\n\nYou should really consider going to some AA meetings
Jacked up my neck and shoulder hanging on for dear life while I rode him like a boss. Plus my house smells like broccoli, bad! How's YOUR morning?
It's snowing in May and there was a law school party at the strip club. The end is near.
Everyone's impressed that I actually got pee all over his car since I'm a girl and they're a little curious..
She deleted me on Facebook. I think it's safe to say that she knows I fucked him now.
I don’t understand his energy
What? Nice? Lmao
It’s amazing such a big dick belongs to such a boring guy
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