we're drinking boxed wine and eating string cheese. It's like a wine tasting for poor people.
I wish you could see the look on my boss's face right now.
wtf?
Before you passed out in the middle of the NHL 10 party you had to prove that you were a better fighter than Patrick Kane. Your not. Thanks for the black eye dipshit.
So there is a chick dressed up in a vagina costume handing out free condoms next to the dude handing out free Bibles and preaching about sin. I love college.
he prob just wants to be friends and here i am photoshopping our kids
Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right?
i feel like the 7 eleven by your house knows our deepest, darkest secrets
There is a visibable outline from you in the grass. its you in the fetal position...
Another Sunday, another 100 chicken nuggets
I think I may have walked up to her while she was with her friends and asked for a "do over".
Well, we broke up and instead of putting my shit out on the curb like a normal person, she fucking donated everything to Goodwill. So now I have to pay two dollars for one of my own t shirts.
If you ever insult pizza rolls again, I will dragon kick you in the throat
They are doing the auction. One of the items in the auction is a grenade launcher.
Woke up and took my pants off only to realize that I was wearing my shirt from last night as my underwear
Sorry for face licking, I probably won't do it again.
Also, I love cats. I sat on the floor and they sat with me.
Can you send me the picture of me licking the cows udders?
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