I would like to feed your fingertips to the wolverines.
I'm afraid that if I tell my sister I think Zachary Quinto is gay I'll have to put her on suicide watch for the next week or so
Whats a good hint for stop bitching im gonna give you head
so literally, as soon as i tripped and fell and hit the floor the earthquake started. hows THAT for a self esteem boost?
we can't become the bulimic house in the complex dude. Besides, you need teeth for your career.
21st Birthday Idea: liquor store gift registry. Give me a promotion.
If she has AMC, I may have to fuck her today. I want to catch up on the walking dead.
I received a sext from my girlfriend, and a deal for free chips and guacamole at chipotle at the same time. I have tasted heaven, and it is beautiful.
it wasn't a total waste of time; I mean how often do you get to play scotch pong?
.....fair enough
especially when i'm drunk. his dick might as well be made of cotton candy.
We are making a pool on how long he stays sober this time you want in?
When is the right time to ask your new roommate for her school schedule so she doesn't walk in on you fucking some rando in the kitchen in the middle of the afternoon?
I want your cock. I also want to cuddle you and tell you how amazing you are, because you know balance.
So you're saying that I ended up challenging a dude to Uno then proceed to punch them in the face?
i told her we had a class about unicorns together. i'd say it was a good night
Randomize
