Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
I almost got runover on the sidewalk by a car but wen it got closer it was a crackhead walking with the whole front of a car... bumper, lights and all... I love New York.
I'm thinking I had intended to send you pics cuz I woke up naked
Yeah man i woke up and only had a Jimmy John's wrapper covering myself..
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
i am laugh crying so hard the guy next door stopped playing guitar
low point in my life last night. licked pizza grease off my iphone screen..
Totally shot down my boss for sex today. Approaching this weekend with a clear conscience and an untouched vagina.
Dude. I've never been with a guy who just wanted to go down on me all the time including while I'm shooting zombies on call of duty. My life is complete.
btw, whatever u do, dont try and take that towel away from her..i tried, it got ugly..she said some things im sure she regrets.
the problem is i have six tabs of acid in my freezer and no self control
Masterbating to Tolstoy. You?
You don't know the capacity of my vagina
My roommate randomally bought me two bags of pretzels. Worst "Sorry you can hear me fucking my boyfriend everynight" gift ever.
Also—I just realized that your wedding gift is still on my dining room table. So...as awful as I am for not yet sending it (and I still need your address), at least I didn’t bring my screaming children to potentially the most important day of your life?
Randomize