Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
Do you think the neighbors will know I was the one giving out the penis shaped lollipops to the children?
i didnt have any regrets until i found out he was a freshman.... and the only reason he got into yale was because of soccer... and he wasnt premed.
I just want school to he over so we can build a big tent, do drugs inside it, and watch cartoons until the sun comes up.
That's all I've ever wanted.
I just try to date guys based on what I need like I am trying to find an electrician now
You gays are geniuses
I'm considering offering a class on how to find good porn.
I heard drunk is the new sober. I heard me say that. To a cop. Can you come get me??
Lesson learned. No more vodka and toaster strudel
we got cupcakes after we fucked. gives a whole new meaning to sugar daddy
I don't think tits should taste like fish.
WTF DOES CAROLINE HAVE GLASS IN HER FACE
She said my penis was powerful and magnificent
Totally writing my paper on the toilet. Makes me miss you.
I just woke up and I don't really remember anything past 1pm. How much am I missing?
A good 10-11 hours. You got laid twice. Also, you out-ran a cop and played football with a lamp.
I was high as fuck laying down in the back seat while she gave him head. Most awkward chill moment of my life.
Randomize
