After he came all over my face, he proceeded to give me a high five. I can't even act upset because I always put myself in these situations. Did I mention D3: Mighty Ducks was playing in the background?
yours is so small it looks like an acorn!!
I know man...but i cant pass up a catholic school girl fantasy
I just told a dude I hooked up with last night he was the pick of the litter.
Peach margaritas. And fuck whatever you're about to say, the girl to guy ratio is like 6:1. I need those odds
Who's got a bloodstream full of margaritas by 2pm? Not you, that's for sure, because you've got one of those "real" jobs.
Just paid a $5 cover at a bar I stumbled by so I could puke in a toilet and not in public.
So yeah you need to stop having near death experiences at McDonalds.
I want him to rummage through my vagina. with unwashed hands.
Besides he said his dick was as big as a loaf of bread and that it was broken. So I was like u have half a head of hair and a broken dick that looks like bread. No thanks. Im good.
I mean, I introduced myself as "the after party". I think he knew early in the night he was in for a bangathon.
So it was all good until she started grabbing my beard and telling me to "roar little lion"
He's nice and all but I think I rather masturbate my way to happiness instead.
I offered to trade my cat for a bottle of tequila as long as it had a handle on it and realized I had a problem
He made me ask permission to to cum and it made me cum.
Randomize
