glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
I don't know where your sunglasses are, I was too preoccupied with girls not old enough to drive past midnight.
You were so drunk that you were trying to take pictures of a MILF at the park so you could send them to Adam, but you didn't want to "seem creepy," so you used taking pictures of her son as a cover. Needless to say, cops were called.
Is it a bad thing that the only time i wear nice clothes to class, is when i get too fucked up the night before and wear the same clothes i went out in?
Bubblewrap condoms. We can steal Ziplock's new slogan. Protection you can hear.
I just won unlimited hot dogs for life. I'm so glad I smoked
I'm taking her home. She just told a 90 yo woman in a packers hat to "suck her cock".
True. I'd rather snort cocaine off a homeless guy then work on the weekend...Actually that may not be that bad.
So basically, I've just woken up in another random bed and I go to get my pants and he's wearing them. Like my underwear is in them... What the fuck is wrong with my life?
It got heated then she just left and I was all alone in the women's restroom.
Sad fact: I'm doing that thing where I'm bored so I give myself Princess Leia hair and drink alcohol.
This drive is very scenic
And I'm chugging whiskey in the back
As you should, soak in all this country has to offer
I just got St Patricks day and the day after St Patricks day off, wich I'm pretty sure is as close to a raise as I'll ever get.
We broke the bed while I was handcuffed to the headboard and let's just say that was a hard one to explain to the RA
I'm pretty sure I smell like alcoholism and shame. And it's not a pretty scent.
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