When we were fucking i started barking and growling at her.. you shoulda seen her face
Just wanted to make sure that my favorite hot mess is still alive. I dont need words, just a response of any sort. K hope youre living
bhystjhitsjhtiajielrfrhaug
This is sufficient.
would it be subtle enough if I played birthday sex on repeat while I may or may not be stripping?
the campus cop used the word depravity in our citation.
No. I want to vom filet mignon and ziti bits everywhere and my body feels like I ran a cock triathalon. I feel less triumphant and more like death.
he threw up in a solo cup, then washed it out and used it to play flip cup. Im not sure if thats resourceful or disgusting.
So i am officially handcuffed to the pole on the party bus while taking jello shots.....this shall be an interesting night
I thought my ass was sore from the gym then I realized it was from being spanked. Confusing time in my life.
Is the Chairman of the College Republicans throwing upon your toilet right now? 'Murica!
He was lasting forever and I couldn't take it so I faked an asthma attack
When she says 'Polish hangover cure' she just means more vodka. Don't do it.
I need a fuck buddy with more available hours
Look, if a guy shows up at your house. He's short, name is Logan, has weird vertical hair, let him in, give him food, and a place to stay. He's on a ver important mission. And I am he. as he is me and we are all together. And we are the eggman, goo goo gajoob.
If I die here, tell my vagina and my cats that I'm sorry.
Do you think my laundromat will notice that the bloodstain on my sheets is in the shape of a face?
Randomize
