yeah you're probably right.. i should stop equating love with getting naked on a webcam for him.
An accidental pregnancy to a guy with a trustfund is no mistake. It is a gift from god.
You're not invited to the wedding. They don't want you starting a "who's fucked the bride the most" contest.
It's ok for me to have his baby but I can't be his friend on fb. Wth is wrong with this
Listen, you can whine about not having a "red" wine glass, or you can suck it up and chug it from the vase like the rest of us. The choice is yours.
Dude, she gave me a handski that literally felt like she was starting a lawn mower...
I have to deal with three things I do not like this weekend. Pooping in toilets that are not mine. Air mattresses. Not beating off in the shower.
I do have a life. It just consists of making scarves and chesse straws now
Just to update you. I am dead. So your probably gonna have to find a new roommate
i just had to pick up my 18 year old cousin from the police station for hosting a party, and i had to do this stoned wow
Paige is home safe.
Actually, she's here now, punching me in the face. You should've kept her keys.
Mashed potatoes are always the fuckin answer ok.
You rinsed the beer pong ball off in my White Russian
I just bought a mini nerf gun so he could make a bowl out of it, I deserve the fuck buddy of the year award!
just realized I'll be in a check out line with just Hershey syrup and condoms. I don't know if I am setting a good image for our generation
Randomize
