i'll give you all the meat in my fridge in exchange for 2 condoms.
direct quote: "i'm so over my clit" either best or most awkward conversation possible with your COUSIN
Just heard "Kiss Me Though the Phone" for the first time. Amazed how it took Soulja Boy two songs to become a shitter version of Ja Rule.
Who is John, and why is his named carved into our toilet?
How do the people at CVS not know your living in their bathroom?
As hard as i've been partying lately their gonna have to revoke my organ donor status
as he was bent over the toilet, he turned to me and said "barbarian kyle is much stronger than regular kyle" and then went right back to puking.
Why do I have a vague memory of your entire fraternity climbing in through my bedroom window?
It's accurate though. I am legitimately passionate about pickles. I crave pickles the same way I crave sex. It is a deep rooted animalistic need
There are grandparents doing keg stands I don't know
I said his dick tasted like a Hawaiian Sweet Roll. And then I yelled MAHALO.
You know the sex was good when he had to ask which way was north before he left.
Anybody can graduate from college sober. You try it while being stoned every day for the last three years. 2.75 baby.
Life lesson... stop having side pieces that know each other...ffs.
I begin to question your sobriety when you both left here shirtless, with beers in one hand and shotguns in the other
Randomize
