She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
he was uncircumcised...I HAVE NOT YET REACHED THAT SKILL LEVEL OF DICK
im so hungover...we just watched The Perfect Storm and i got seasick
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
I like daylight savings. I don't care if it's 4 oclock it's not daydrinking if it's dark out
seek help.
Apparently my gaydar only works on americans. Frenchie capris has two topless chicks in our kitchen making him breakfast.
I have three paper towels stuck up my vagina. This is not a time to be calm.
future-me showed up mid trip and gave us a thumbs up.
Just smokin in the creek with some deer, they like the smoke, I know.
Slip and slide hallway was not one of my better ideas.
Honestly it's a super power. I can try it a million different ways and nothing happens. Donnie casually says "ok this is now a toppless party" and it all kicks-off
I really want some funfetti cake but I feel like its more socially acceptable to go out and drink
And then the night went full on bisexual.
I'll be perfectly honest; there are times other guys have consented to have sex with me because of my punctuation.
I need to start dating older women. We tried sexting and she used more emojis than actual words. It was so bad that I did the math...her messages were 54% emoji. No one should make me feel this old when I'm only 28.
Randomize
