Sweater Vest, Chin Strap, Beard, sporting a white Beret- Please don't ever let me be THAT guy.
Are you with Adam and his vodka?
Yeswdsssss I masde his pickle gi away ans he go anbnoued
I've come to the conclusion that the only reason I fucked him was because he reminded me of Seth Rogen.
you came downstairs saying you were now 'dressed to impress'
what was i wearing?
nothing
there are casual beer cans in all of the public trashes, i belong here
Say hello to your nephew Sir Isaac Meriwether van Catsworth
I'm going to have to start taking your phone after ten. That's when all the cat pictures come
I'm going to go out on a limb and say last night was a success, also the neighbors are counting down the days until we move out.
And my only real exposure to Russian culture is you and Internet porn.
Next Halloween I want us to dress up as jockeys, get drunk, and ride a carousel all night until we throw up or declare a winner
Are you vicariously golddigging through me?!
Yeah but who says we can't be shitfaced and tan at the same time?
My mother expressed her concerns about my drinking via a facebook message.
And pointless. I'm fully vested in all my calories coming from booze today. The salad just fucks that shit up
Come to my place after work and we can discuss our finances over a coors delight and a fire ball shot
I just woke up naked in a bed with your brother. WHAT THE HELL HAPPENED TO NOT LETTING EACH OTHER DO STUPID THINGS?
You fucked my brother?!
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