what happened last night??
everyone saw ******'s vagina
and that's just the beginning
Not everyone can get ass. Some people are good at building rockets. You’re good at sleeping with many men. It’s an art.
My recently uploaded pictures to facebook: Me partying on Beale St. with a single girl on each arm. Ex's recently upload pictures: Several pictures of cats. I win.
Real housewives of new joisy starts MONDAY. Skype session after? Virtual slap the bag?
If I could have all the money back from the pregnancy test i've bought- I could buy myself a vacation.
Or a large amount of condoms?!?
Never again. I promise. My old gay body can't handle that much adrenaline twice.
I already banned bobbing for apples. While drunk that's just drowning near fruit.
I've literally already typed in by booty call text for friday night. all I have to do now is wait for is drunk me to press send
They have some sort of agreement that they can sleep with other people if it helps then achieve their goal, or something like that
How awkward
Yeah it's pretty fucked up
Well, I can't remember Thursday and my left ass cheek hurts like hell, I'm guessing Mike's bachelor party was a success.
I think I met my butt stuff soulmate
Ill try not let guys feel my boobs for free drinks next time, no promises tho. I am my boyfriends worst nightmare.
Hey. You got pizza and sex. How much more can you ask for?
i think i puked but i couldve been a dream and i may have madeout with a 20 something guy infront of my managers...also possible dream.
Totally unrelated, but by the way I DO have one ball bigger than the other.
Randomize
