you dont need to remember merediths name haha. only jane
Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
I woke up this morning and the first thing i saw was the harry potter tattoo on his left butt cheek.
he gave me an orgasm. multiple times. the weird stuff he did in middle school is now irrelevant.
I'm blazed about to take my 8am final. Another girl is too. We just looked each other in the eyes. She's my soul sister.
He turned me down because he was still doing his taxes.
Drunk me was responsible for doing it, but sober me was definitely cheering him on
gave him road head on the way to his grandparents house. purposely didn't let him finish, the sexual tension over turkey was indescribable.
I told him to keep his feelings in his pants because they're annoying and to just fuck me.
This guy punched out a light, puked in the sink, stole the mailbox, then tried to tell ME that I had to leave the party... Then his dog shit on the floor.
I might have been the first person to be rolling balls at a referee seminar
Sorry, all I could picture was you jamming your dick into a lemon.
god it feels good to gold a bottle of opiates again.
I think that typo was actually more appropriate than what you intended.
He is getting married. In the time it took for this conversation he probably cheated on her three times
I JUST HAD TO SNORT THE REST OF MY BAG OF COKE BECAUSE THE BAG RIPPED IN THE WORK BATHROOM.
I'm guessing you feel amazing due to all the caps?
LETS GET THIS SHIT DONE. IM GONNA GET THIS SHIT DONE, FOREVER.
Randomize
