i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
He looks like a mix between a retired piano teacher and a cat that just swallowed a sock.
I just spent the last hour reading customer reviews on amazon.com for the book "it hurts when I poop." Send help.
I just gave my patient permission to swallow while pregnant. She was so embarrassed to ask...but her bf was really happy with the answer.
Every single item that was in my fridge is now in my hot tub. Please help
He went out to smoke and when he came back I was still in the same spot naked and unable to breathe.
All I could say was, "ladies and gentlemen, THIS is why I drive 30 mins"
he didn't stitch me up last time. in fact, he yelled at me for bleeding.
When we got home I apparently addressed everyone as 'peasant' since it was my birthday, this followed by me demanding for my "peasants to wash me".
Your level of morning after guilt is too much right now. Do less.
I wonder how horrible I look to customers. There's cuts all over my face and I can't talk.
What are the cuts from? Head-butting the bathroom light fixture?
Honestly that's best case scenario.
I think when your throwing up on the highway on the way to pick up your mom from the airport is a sign to slow down.
is it bad that I'm more worried about having to take out my piercings than the fact that I might be having a kid
Apparently the girl he banged in the bathroom yelled at him for hitting on me all night. But whatever, he was holding her hand for most of it
I was just told that I'm the Sherlock Holmes of drunken sex. I'll take it.
I blacked out after the piñata full of condoms
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