Woke up this morning at my parent's house. No idea how I got here... what happened last night? Was it bad?
We using my standards or yours?
She didn't know my name but she knew I was Canadian so she just called me Canada. It sounded like the national anthem when we were fucking.
wait one more day. tuesday is my official "i hit on you and/or we hooked up this weekend" friend request day.
Matt is in the hospital again. the night nurse text me asking not to bring the boombox again. is it sad or awesome that they are starting to know us?
What's the second line of that rhyme that starts "Vicodin before scotch...?"
Ladystoner tip: if eyes are bloodshot, lime green eyeliner makes them appear less red. its basic artt.
It's totally ok to sleep with him. The only place I have feelings for him is in my vagina.
Im pretty sure at one point a very high you yelled, with actual tears in your eyes, "im not wrestling with you anymore, you dont respect my safe word!!"
I hate being the only medical professional in the group. I always end up patching you guys or being the DD when I'm on call. I have problems I need to drown in booze too...
I cant see straight, her clothes are all over my floor and I'm covered in bite marks... No I will not go to brunch with you
2015 is the year I FINALLY ALMOST had enough dick to satisfy me.
Just leave a note saying "riding dick see you in the mornig"
New fact of life: getting Becca high never helps any situation at all ever.
I want to find him again. His Corona tank top and I were made for each other.
Arrived home from picking Mom and Nana up at the airport to find Marc buck ass nude beneath the Christmas tree. Nana says she always knew I was queer.
Randomize