I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
Quoting wale wont save you from herpes
just hooked up with an air force officer in a hotel room paid for by the military. i feel like i should go around thanking taxpayers for the assist.
No, that was the night I was sneezing out barf
I'm not sure...it could be the pasta I ate from her sink, the dominoes, or just the alcohol. Or a wicked combination of all 3.
I'm voting my liver organ of the month. The award ceremony is next weekend.
I should probably go to bed before I start to care about why I started drinking in the first place.
I have reverted to folding laundry while watching porn. how much sadder can my life get?
How's dating the med student working out for you?
After we had sex last night he showed me where my spleen was.
A true anatomy project.
Sometimes turtles just really trip me out man
Look. When I let you cum on my tits don't fuck it all up by going "SKEET SKEET SKEET" it just pisses me off.
No he can't come. I swear to gods he's "Why We Can't Have Nice Things" given physical form.
Babe, Have you see my pants?
Try Jay street in Brooklyn.. that's where I last remember seeing them.
My bed smells like the plague
I remember you banged her while I was dying on your couch, so good call
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