dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
I just found three unopened cans of PBR behind our futon that I think I was saving for winter.
I need a hobby that doesnt involve alcohol and my tv
No I'm not coming over. That Bob Ross drinking game is too intense.
i decided i'll just settle for a gay guy who can manage to fuck me like the straight guys do. but here i go again, talking about my dream man.
We are going to be Siegfried and Roy for Halloween and you are going to be the tiger.
Things bear mace does not do: repel bears. Things bear mace does do: piss off bears, give bystanders asthma attacks. Lesson learned
Highlight of the night was you walking into the men's room yelling "My husband is diabetic" and crawling under the stall to yell at me.
Naw, the sex dungeon had to come down so we could build a nursery. Cause and effect really.
I distinctly remember holding up a piece of ham pizza and screaming: "WHO THE FUCK EATS HAM PIZZA" in the face of a bunch of scared 13 year old girls faces, while my own sister laughed in mine.
What's the policy on calling guys who have kids daddy...
He showed up on school grounds wearing nothing but a suit of armor. Really at this point I'm more impressed than angry.
Why didn't we pregame for this?
Because it's breakfast!?!
How does the curb feel today?
It's stronger than my elbow. But I found my lighter while I was down there.
He made me cum 3 times, then immediately after sex packed a bowl and passed it to me. Yeah.. I'll keep him.
Randomize
