please pick me up with an explanation of why i shacked in a trailer with a guy who doesnt have a car.
I can’t believe the potential orgy I left behind at Waffle House.
I have no idea what happened after 2 AM. I woke up on my bike, in my bed, with a deep thigh bruise.
Happy heartbreak day....you got chocolates, I'm eating them/ throwing them out the window at passing couples
How was your 8:30 class today?
Non existent. I just threw up in my water bottle on the bus.
i need some food
Holy shit I forgot about you stabbing him.
You've gotta make sure the carpets match the drapes, though.
I am not dying my bush blue.
So is it safe to say that my only objective from last night is to finish this entire jar of peanut butter?
Accomplishment of the day: changing my tampon at 38,000 ft with turbulence. Fasten seatbelt sign was definitely on.
I am sure I don't wanna know but I have to ask... Why is there a kiddie pool full of jello in the living room?
He isn't understanding any of my Fetty Wap references. He may not be a keeper after all.
Definitely woke up.this morning to a random girls head in my toilet and her mom knocking on my door.
Don't worry about us we're making Mac and cheese
MAC AND CHEESE ABORTED, WE HAD FIRE
It's official. I have spent more money on weed than on textbooks this semester.
I guess she found the pillow case full of vomit I hid last night: "Oh my God. Oh my God. In my fucking FRIDGE?! Really? Hope your dick falls off there's puke all over my food. Fucking die."
Randomize
