Your TV has the DVD menu for White Chicks permanently burned into the screen. I can't anymore. That's just a whole different level that I cannot comprehend.
Well, if they're both my boyfriend.. Then i cheated on both of them.
Just passed a guy passed out on a riding lawn mower in his front yard.
My warmest regards to the fish in that koi pond I puked in.
Today I met the neighbor that shares my bedroom wall. When I pointed out my unit, he said, "Oh, that's you? Oh... that's you." I didn't think much of it until I was in bed tonight and I heard him clear his throat. He's. Heard. Everything.
Yea. You cant just squeeze my balls. They are sensitive
The effect you have on my penis from a different state is impressive
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
Yea we just broke up
so do we start sexting now or later?
Dude, I woke up with wet dollar bills in my boxers where did you take me???
That's why god made go-pro's and tequila
You are not the cause of late onset lesbianism.
She puked off the side of the cruise ship onto a newlyweds balcony table and they watched it all happen then they made her clean it up
outside on the street drinkin, walked into a random house and asked to pee, some kid hands me a beer and says i have to chug it first
If history is any guide, his morals are no match for my tits
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