so i told my doctor my symptons and she just shook her head at me
Is it appropriate to get drunk, stand up at the wedding and make a toast to "the time the lovely bride asked me to come on her chest"?
our generation is not ready to get married
He keeps asking me for girl advice, i told him im an expert at getting drunk, not girls
we were totes just talking about. huu in the bathbub. 5 girlszzz
All I kmoe is rheres a coffee pot full pf vodka in my purse
How do people deal with hangovers? I literally want to eat my own face.
Pretty sure I just heard the turkey yell "don't put me in there" as it was going in the oven. way too high for this holiday.
Dude he's not responding... I'll take that as an unpleasant visit to the clinic
Is it acceptable to have my intern get me pedialite and plan b?
It's a learning experience. She can add to her resume that she cured her bosses hangover and poor decisions
Super awkward when the coworker you made out with in exchange for molly last weekend keeps coming over to your cube and trying to talk to you
But we only had three ninja turtles. So everyone that would ask us where Donatello was, we would say "what? He's gone? Shredder is at it again!"
Anyway. I unfriended all of these people like a grown up and I am never talking to them again
I think he just tried to put your boyfriend in a trashcan....
I've never known a porn star before
There's not even an emoji for this
She just took all of the blankets in the house and threw them in the yard, because 'the grass was cold'..
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