your horoscope this morning...very interesting...good luck today
you'd think he'd be slightly more humble with a penis that small
alright she left, finally time to fart up the room
Said he had been eating pineapple for a week before our 1st date. Not sure if thankful for his consideration or offended by his assumption.
She is only going home with him in hopes to give him herpes. She has been plotting some master revenge since 7th grade.
The idea of snorting emergen-c actually just crossed my mind.
I think I collapsed a disk in my spine when I drunkenly lifted that fat girl on my shoulders to chicken fight at the pool.
So I pull up to an apartment complex and immediately felt like I was here to get stoned.
jen just told me ur idea of revenge was saluting while letting his bong float away while attached to some balloons.
Novelty of the week: Getting my lipstick back in an evidence bag
Molly was fun. I was in a captain planet onesie in Wal-Mart talking to everyone haha
I just wanted to personally thank you for throwing clementine slivers at me across the room while we made out
Almost lost a vagina lip in the great shave of '16
Got electrocuted a second ago, is it weird that I have a boner?
Laying in bed naked is fun. I now see why guys love boobs... They're sooo bouncy! This long distance relationship is really killing my sex life.
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