I'm ready for my liver to be the last casualty of 2009
I forgot how few teeth there are in this state...
i just packed a bowl on a big bird place mat and smoked it in a spaceship with a slide. i love babysitting.
He just reenacted his orgasm in front of my roommates....using a squeeze bottle of mayonnaise.
We really need to check into harvesting part of our liver now
Either he was jacking off or having a seizure next to me in bed. Either way, I was too lazy to help.
Wine floats aren't as good of an idea as they seem
the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless
last night on the strip the guy screamed at you YOU GOTTA WORK ON YOUR CALVES.
no he just sat there holding the hammer and grinning insanely
I made him fuck me with my coat zipped up and a unicorn mask on. That level of drunk sex. Weird and creepy yet highly satisfying.
Yeah I blacked out in a wiener costume.... I think I'm ready to come home now.
If you're signed up as "sober sister" can you do cocaine or nah
I'm like the total package- I don't want a relationship and I have daddy issues. What more could he want?
He's such a jerk. If only his penis was attached to someone else
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