Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
I'm just gonna go nail your roommate after we break up anyway.
You spilled spaghetti on the floor, and kept telling the noodles to "settle down" as you tried to clean it up
We're trying to leave but amy's hitting on the guy who mans the nacho cart
No, I googled it. Apparently, male thongs are the next snuggy and a lot of guys love wearing them for the support.
I defriended her. I just can't support someone whose profile picture is of their water birth.
there is no excuse for drinking mascato in your room alone while listening to one-hit wonders from the 90s
We fed him just...so many bright colored crayons when he was blacked out. I hope he looks at his shits because this could be all for nothing
I hope you have a dream of a sloth with my face touching you erotically
I have to remind myself to breathe. That hungover.
the problem is i have six tabs of acid in my freezer and no self control
Knowing that porn stars want to fall in love is the weirdest thing I've found to be beautiful recently. I'm so lonely.
You know what else? He didn't even get to see my butt. And my butt is really cute. Car sex is awful.
Yeah,I'm just gonna keep fucking other guys til this idiot figures out he loves me.
I got a gay guy to motorboat me. These tits could change the world, I'm telling you.
Randomize