Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
You're boyfriend is farting in his sleep. The last one sounded like a threat.
We put her face under a blacklight.....it looked like fireworks
so I have this game called 14 beers left. and we both have to drink 7 before we leave
I think I'm going to die by hangover. I'm in my spanish class. So I guess I'm going to be muerte.
im pretty sure while i was fucking her my dog was fucking her dog too
this just proves how much faith i have in "us".. what should we be for halloween..?
we should look into getting a golf cart for the weekend. i have a feeling legs wont be a sufficient source of transportation.
The random guy I fucked from craigslist said I had the best smile. I take compliments where i can get them
so hungover. I'm actually considering eating the snow off the roof so I don't have to leave my bed
I only have one kid whom I wish to hit in the face with an active jackhammer. How's work?
After I was kicked out of the last frat I blacked out, woke up in the hospital with no clothes no phone and no idea what happened last night. But i got hospital socks, thats a win in my book.
When I said I wanted you to make noise during sex, I didn't mean mocking ones.
I gave him the white girl "you spilled my psl look" and walked away
don't worry, i'll dog sit again, the barking made the sex better, its like he was cheering for us, we were just THAT good.
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