i failed horribly. studying for that final was as pointless as Vinnie is to Jersey Shore
So the next morning, she had to tell her kids we were moving furniture around all night.
Question: does the slut gene come from the mother or the father? im trying to figure out who to blame.
I feel like his dick looks like a decorative autumn squash.
Dude she's famous. She's on an episode of campus pd. Can't not fuck her
We were all definitely blackout with drunk goggles on, even though you and Amanda were the only ones dressed up as it.
Me ending up in the fetal position in my shower is becoming far too commonplace. It's like a weekly therapy session
He said and I quote "Had to beat one off in the Burger King bathroom before I went over." Thats somebody that takes pride in his work.
I'm in the freezer. Shit took away any trace of hangover outa my body.
Just saw a couple do like 5 Sakai bombs and my dad goes "who says love is dead"
Tequila, beer, rum, gin, and vodka all mixed in my body last night. The whole "never turn down free booze" is catching up to me. Hungover = understatement of the year.
I have visions of guys in cheetah costumes with suits over it pissing on a children how are you
They're giving you narcotics aren't they?
If I offered to share would you come visit me?
Must be why he thought choking was foreplay. Like WTF? No.
he tried to have the "are we in a relationship" chat last night. I stuck my fingers in my ears, yelled lalalalalala very loudly at him and told him I would stop having sex with him if he ever tried that conversation again. bad person, or just being a realist?
Randomize