I'm pretty sure his head is too big to fit between my legs. Worthless.
If Rob Pattinson gets another fucking MTV award, I'm going to vomit.
BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
Instead of a promise ring i got my clit peirced, its a promise that ill always give you ass! =]
Just saw a Mexican guy pushing a stroller with 3 twelve packs of corona in it with a toddler struggling to keep up on foot behind him
I swallowed and made him pancakes in the morning. I feel almost as desperate as Jennifer Aniston at this point.
Tell him I thought his Superman stand on your bed and cum all over your back was quite funny
his version of basketball was throwing hot sauce packets down my cleavage at taco bell at 2 am with his buddy.the cashier kept score
id one day like to live in a world full of emotionless and wonderfully fullfilling sex...
It started out as friends with benefits and now I'm picking up her kids from daycare...what has happened to me
i was making a gravity bong in my room and my dad walked in. he helped me finish. i love being home for the holidays.
We lost a person.... if you see a man in yellow shorts and nothing else walking around let me know...
You know your late night booty call was a huge fail when you go back to your car after it's over, and it's still warm.
just had sex in a stairwell with six feet five inches worth of drama
So if your sore it's because you tried to tackle a tree last night. When I told you at the party, you said "What do you expect, I'm an athlete!"
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