He was dressed in cheap leather and smelled like death.
Journey is playing on the radio....I think it is a sign I am going to pass my drug test
so i havent checked yet but im almost positive that my left ass cheek is bruised. any idea what happened last night.
what the fuck man? i was JUST texting you the same thing. FUCK
it's fine if we fail the bar, we were never going to satisfy the moral character requirement anyway
I want to punch and suck your dick at the same time. I don't think we have the healthiest of relationships.
The only good thing about this is that the pharmacy guy will stop trying to add me on Facebook.
She stopped mid hookup to ask me if we'd be done before Taco Bell closed.
I keep replaying commercials about kittens frolicking and was crying nonstop. WILL MY PERIOD LAST FOREVER!?
I was making out with him, and then his friend randomly took off my pants and started going down on me. My first semi-threesome was a success.
Right. Will do. I'll call you if I need a ride. (that is a double meaning, go with it.)
Is it inception if it feels like another uterus is going to burst out of my current uterus?
Do you congratulate someone for having bigger tits, or is that a no no?
Lol I screamed "GOT AN ORDER OF VERSACE TACOS UP" and the whole kitchen was just like who the fuck is this kid
I was on the verge of being completely over him and then he went and made his Instagram not private... ITS LIKE HE KNEW
I just saw a girl on the phone crying and eating a sandwich. Thats talent right there.
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