shit is crazy. i just keep thinking that this kid growing inside Emily used to live in my balls.
I've been congratulating people on facebook about their forthcoming pregnancies. I can't wait to see how this plays out
I'm watching Cheaper By The Dozen. I almost forgot that Hilary Duff was a really shitty actor before she was a really shitty singer.
Semi hypothetical question. Do you think its physically possible to bruise your clit?
Remind me to tell you the one about the cashier that wouldn't sell me Jim Beam and NyQuil.
can you look at this picture and tell me if you think this my kid?
I just spent the last ten minutes making a timeline of my sex life. 2010 and 2011 I am calling "I can't believe Im still clean" years.
I think I might be drunk enough to cut my own hair
I would feel bad sleeping with her unless all of her personalities were on board with it.
I just don't know the best way to tell him I think I saw him in a porn. I mean I got off to it, isn't there some level of awkwardness there?
Bad Decision October is in full swing. I was telling people that "I put on eye makeup today, I'm takin' a dude home with me!".
he calls himself the gay cupid because he matches two guys looking to hookup on craigstlist with each other. get me out of here. please.
I'M MAKING HIKING PLANS WITH THE GIRL WHO IS DATING MY EX, THAT IS PERSONAL FUCKING GROWTH
They found you popping and locking it alone in the parking lot
Okay, so is being determined to have my vagina licked by a woman on Valentine's day an acceptable goal?
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