I met a girl last nite that charged by the inch. i didnt have enough money but i figured shed be a good deal for u
Do you need to be saved?
No I think I'm God
I guess I should mention that I have already fucked the Fed Ex guy.
That changes everything.
so apparently dipping a tampon in red gatorade and throwing it out the window on the highway is a $100 fine
He's like the houdini of condoms. I never even realized he put one on before we fucked. he's magical.
We've shared an experience, my friend. I, too, have talked on the phone with a parent while giving a handjob
as it turns out, there is no "i was in the pool" excuse for adderall-induced shrinkage.
Just put my hand under my pillow and found a peach ring. Lat night just came rushing back.
the whole story woulnd't be so depressing if i had made out with ANYONE but the piano player.
I cannot take someone's straight and gay virginity in one threesome. It's just too much responsibility.
Bro, she used the potato bongs to make French fries after. She's deff a keeper.
He just remixed a spongebob song with 2 chainz..... Clearly I love him
I just really need a hug and a shower beer
Something bad happened. I'm just giving you some notice. So you can smoke some pot and hide all sharp items in the house.
if you want the landscaping job, the uniform is a speedo. no exceptions.
Randomize
