i study at coffee shops because all these damn artsy people motivate me to work towards a real job.
So there is a guy driving a robot around the college of engineering selling energy drinks
Also when i was high i would close my eyes and see a puppy on a grill having pancake batter poured on it.... And for whatever reason it was fucking hilarious.
Well I talked to some Canadians today, and I'm keeping a vigilant watch for sharks, so I'm pretty booked up.
I wish him all the best and hope one day he can afford the surgery to remove his head from his ass
People dont know what to do when a naked fat guy is running towards them. they panic
The $10 cab ride turned into a $60 cab ride when you puked down the back of his seat trying to whisper in his ear. He was a trooper though, he came into to wash off in the sink and still tried to get your number.
Yeah. I don't know. I'm just gonna show up at her place on valentines day with a jock strap, box of chocolates, and rose clenched between my ass cheeks with "be mine" written across my glorious man titties.
While I appreciate the pity sex (seriously, THANK YOU) we should not do it 3feet away from my ex when he's passed out next time. Awkward.
he stopped mid makeout and said "can I pray for you?"
It's been three years since Kelly shit in the to go box that we put in Sam's mailbox after we broke up. Considering Sam and I are friends again, should I finally tell him?
i still cant feel my toes or walk straight...its been 2 days.
is it bad that im laying on a beach towel in my room with my lights on high pretending to be tanning on the beach in the summer?
It's okay to admit that you're into redheads.
Did I honestly think it was a good idea to wear my pink robe out in public at 2 in the morning ?
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