what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
There's too many weed/neon/felt Sublime posters in this room and someone just put on a Hunter S. Thompson movie. Save me, now.
Just jerked off to Cameron Diaz in "My Sister's Keeper". New low.
Moms kinda upset I threw up in grandmas bedroom. I think ill stay in tonight.
You know what sound is wonderful for a hangover? Listening to the horns from the South Africans at the world cup
Hi Jessica this is Jessica and I am texting you and were taking lime shots and it's fantastic and I broke your elbow and I love you xo
I think the multiple Sunday morning sirens outside my window are a plot by the cops to get back at me for the shit we pulled last night. Or I should move to a better area.
Ugh why does it have to be margarita Monday. Why can't it be pants off dance off beer pong but with jager Monday.
Irrelevant. Does he have queso? That's the real question.
Peanut butter fills the cracks of my heart
What the matter? A girl can't play some Super Mario without being accused of being high?
Which one of you drunk assholes put a parental lock on my cable box last night? More importantly, what's the pin? I'm missing the UK game.
You ripped my pants off and gave me the choice use it or lose it what was I suppose to do.
I just used my citation as a bookmark. Want a beer?
What a weekend. It started with me realizing i might not be straight and ended with me spraining my foot.
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