Its not drinking alone if you got Tiger on the Wii.
I wish everyone walked around campus with a video of what they did this weekend above their heads.
Ive had to apologize to every girl i know today because of you
She brought an overnight bag to my party. Might as well have shown up wearing only a thong and a bottle of whip cream in her hand.
i think the doormans mad at me
well we haven't pretended to pretend we were going to have a threesome with him for a while...
Do you think my job would send me for a second drug test if i took a whole pumpkin pie to work for lunch tomorrow?
What type of outfit says "I know you slept with my boyfriend before and are also way skinnier than me, but I look better...somehow"
She broke up with him yesterday after she cheated on him. He's going a bachelor party next weekend. How has Homeland Security not raised the threat level?
Shit stained towel. The very symbol of how much closer we are as friends. Fall 011... beautiful disaster
Let's learn from last year: Leave the handcuffs at home on St Patrick's Day.
His gf just liked my changed relationship status. She's gonna shit bricks when she finds out he left her for me. Bless her little heart.
I think if I send him enough nudes, he will buy my plane ticket.
He showed up on school grounds wearing nothing but a suit of armor. Really at this point I'm more impressed than angry.
Do not ever look at a picture of an erect ostrich penis. You will regret it.
What time is our conjugal visit?
Umm...who is this?
Randomize
