so they made cookies with their faces printed on them...I ate jaime...she tasted like poop
I faked it too. I just spit on your bed.
Don't ask how, but I'm pretty sure my name is now on a lease to a taco bell franchise in maryland...
I may only be a second year med student but I feel very confident in calling that a micropenis.
I think you can do her, she seemed pretty set for revenge the second time her boyfrind high fives her in the face.
I rode on his Vespa around Florence and fucked him in an empty train. It was like a way sluttier version of Lizzy McGuire
The bartender cut me off so I peed in the corner. How no one noticed I have no idea.
I need to think of the best way to tell this boy he's not getting his pants back
Its everclear night, yall need carbs in your body!
What drink are we having for lunch?
Cops on bikes. I think I can outrun them.
It's funny to me the only time that you clean up is when your weed delivery man is on the way.
It's hard to hold down the snapchat button for video while thrusting. Sorry if the cinematography wasn't Oscar-worthy.
How long until you're healed?
Physically? A week or so. Emotionally? The scars of dislocating my knee at a frat and flashing my panties to the whole crowd wi never heal.
My desperation for dick was off put by his anime figure collection.
Randomize
