Haha na a cat just ran under your car. Howd that happen?
Probably a woman cat. Doesnt think things through
Can't talk. I'm at the Tulsa Sheriff's office with a bunch of rednecks. I bet I'm the only one that voted for Obama.
I bet you're the only one who could read the ballott.
sunday morning discovery: something purple, smelly, and sticky my hair. any suggestions?
She used the word "fragged" in proper context. tell me that's not bust-nut hot.
I walked into the garage and you were telling the bikes that you were not that drunk.
I think the guy in front of me just puked in a styrofoam cup.
Just woke up and my doorbell is on my nightstand... the fuck?
I just put on eyeliner and a diff shirt in case the pizza guy is cute. This is what my dating life has come to
They installed a lotion dispenser in the bathroom at work... its like they want me to masturbate on the clock...
By the way seagulls wings are very soft. And the lesbian and or by sexual twins say hello. Be home in the little bit time frame.
As we were passing the joint around, people were dunking Jenga pieces in Vaseline and sticking them to the window. I also smoked weed with a girl that was in an above the influence commercial.
A 74 year old man offered to let me sleep on his pull out couch last night.
If tits could talk, mine would be bragging
There's a guy in a life size dick costume, and two guys with white shirts that are each half if a pair of breasts in a red bra lol. They came separate but when they saw each other there was some titty fucking in the street, it's only 11
Update: that felon in Georgia I slept with is now a police officer. What a wonderful world
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