At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
My little sister just found a condom in her bag i borrowed... Happy fourteenth birthday.
Last nIght I drank wIth the new guy from fellowshIp & my pastor I've known sInce I was 7. It was agreed by them that I had nIce tIts. I'm not weIrded out In fact I'm flattered...
it only takes four glasses of wine for me to ride an elephant with a stranger.
They're giving me a hotel, and this chick doesn't have a place to stay for the night... I swear this is how real life Porno starts.
She made me cum so hard I couldn't hear for half an hour after
It starts with an S and ends with arah just gave me a bj.
as we waited for a manager to come open the door that we broke while having sex on the wall, we decided to go round two in the hallway before he came back.. god i love hotels.
just to let you know its hard to talk to your father while being fingered up against a car..
I'd say it's a shame and a disservice to the world that we can't stay drunken shitshows to infinity
Drunk in burger king. Having it our way. Free fries. M&m sundaes.
I was at the pharmacy picking up my herpes medication and the pharmacist asked if I had any questions about my medicine, looked at the bottle, and laughed. Insult to injury man.
I had to switch coats with someone at work because you can see the giant sex choke bruise on my neck. Being kinky is hard.
And then you two got up and shouted in near perfect unison "I'M ALWAYS A SLUT FOR BASKIN ROBBINS" The bar just looked at us horrified.
The only thing that makes a night with half a bottle of cheap vodka is the other half of that bottle of cheap vodka.
Randomize
