I think I'd rather ejaculate tabasco. You'd have to scrape out guacamole.
she read insantiy as in-nast-tit-ty and asked what the hell does that mean...
i just googled the alphabet. i couldnt remember if it was jklomnop or jklmnop.
I just imagined your drunkass eating Taco Bell in my living room. This is the Godmother of my potential child.
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
Second day of summer classes and i already got this girl to send me nudes during class
that is WHY your in summer classes
worth it
So my mom and I were talking about what I should get you for christmas. She made it clear I cannot get christmas lingerie.
No, that's just what we do when we hang out. We get drunk, have really awesome sex, then fight about why we never worked as a couple
I'll make some time for you! I don't know how long you need to get off, but I should only need 2-7 minutes, pending what kind of socks I have on.
Honesty, no. I just want to shower you with hot dogs.
You were supposed to behave this weekend.
But... naked.
Dude it's sisterhood of the traveling wine glasses here
Hun, it's always cinco de Drinko in our family. It's like Groundhog Day. Only with more booze.
WHO THE FUCK PEED IN MY BONG
I wish I was there so i could bitch slap his incredibly sexy face
I had a dream that I was smoking rasberries out of a bong. THEY WEREN'T EVEN DRIED...
Randomize