69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
I just told someone i was in "addition and subtraction 160".......and they believed me.
white trash bash was a total success...cops shut it down twice and her hair stayed in rollers all night..she never broke character
ohhh no, absolutely not. i am waaayyy too superstitious to have sex with the self-proclaimed "baby-maker" on father's day...
just tripped. bootyfest 2012 will be my engagement party. i saw the whole future. i'm moving to the beach.
Tonights dinner consisted of washing down my plan b pill with a bottle of wine and toast. College is turning my life around
Last thing I remember is beer bonging sangria. Dear God.
We now only communicate via Xbox messages. Living together is so easy
this old dude from the bar is giving me a ride home in a van, his bumper sticker says " don't laugh your kids could be in here" scary world ou here
I straight up told your dad I've slept with a majority of your family
I gave him blue balls & ate the last slice of pie so the chances of a second date are slim...
Would you consider masturbating to Hocus Pocus an adulthood high or low?
I left my Bacardi and dignity in your freezer. Will come get it later.
He got mad at you last time bc you tried to rap battle him via text. This is strictly business.
So, I can officially cross "getting eaten out in a church confession booth" off my bucket list.
Randomize