i met him on craigslist. and no i'm not a hooker.
Now it won't go down.
You've got a gift.
Houston.. we have a drinking problem..
three words: i give head
three words: not that well
my roommate just said, "don't look at it, just put it iin your mouth"
Dude has a bag of wine attached to his belt. These guys don't fuck around.
After a couple hours you decided you were going to walk home but ten minutes later you called and said you'd puked by the side of the road and you needed us to drive you to the art museum.
Last night we looked at each other with an expression of "fuck I am so done being normal", took off our shirts, and danced around in our bras
he told me he could still feel the blowjob i gave him last year
wow. THAT good huh
I just moved 6 traffic cones blocking a row of traffic. I got applause.
This is stupid. I am not getting knocked up from fucking in his backseat behind a starbucks. I refuse.
Tequila ran out around 11 so she let them do body shots of chips and guacamole instead
She gave you a handy in the bar and you were surprised she was good with a dick?
Hahah good point
Fuck it, I'm going to make my own dick pic album since iOS 10 won't do it for me.
The only thing I remember about us having sex is yelling at him to choke me.
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