Spring semester is just not the same w/o you
Stop being a whore!!! Everyone can see!!!!
Just did the walk of shame across state lines...milestone?
She brought a box of chocolates to give the bartender and now he's giving her free shots.. Why didn't we think of that?
After the baby comes, I'll make us White Russians with my breast milk. That will teach her about sharing.
He got punched in the face, dropped his laptop down a flight of stairs, and broke his roommate's lava lamp, getting all the toxic lava goo everywhere. This is why we don't let him get drunk. And yet here we are.
I was making out with him, and then his friend randomly took off my pants and started going down on me. My first semi-threesome was a success.
Grandma can hear your bong from the living room, please be more quiet. Love mom.
I woke up and they were watching power rangers in japanese so I just found my bra and left
First sex of the summer I'm winning 1-0
GET HOME NOW
Oh shit
That's not a current picture, because if you look deep enough into my eyes you can still see morals. Not these days.
I have no inclination to even want to think about what God's existential meltdown is going to be like. O.o
Now that it's fall I have to prepare for the imminent arrival of ripped up sweatpants shoved into folded over sequined uggs
There's a quesaritto in the oven. Neither of us have been to Taco Bell in 3 weeks.
Turns out I tore my ACL when I fell off the mechanical bull.. Happy bday to me
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