Dude, no joke... I lost my wedding ring in some skank last night
chastity bono is officially a man...and has a really hot girlfriend...life doesn't make sense
He sat there and debated the pros and cons of hooking up with me
idk but i have you stored in my phone as 'guy with beard doing body shots'
NO YOU'RE NOT. I don't want to hear that SHIT. Jameson appreciation day part 1 is saturday and YOU WILL BE READY.
Just promise me we won't die tonight. I can't have an autopsy report that reads "stomach contents: Tequila and semen."
Just finished off a roll of paper towels. Celebration blunt?
I don't understand but I'll be there in 5
I puked right in front of him after winning beer olympics and he still hooked up with me. My life is so easy.
It's 10AM, she's drunk blaring veggie tales and I have a paper to write you've got to be fucking kidding me
I keep telling myself that if Britney can make it through 2007, I can make it through this date.
I'm busy watching infomercials. I'd say I'll join you later, but I'm doing a shot every time they demonstrate how difficult life is WITHOUT this product. So I doubt I'll be able to walk in another... Maybe 40 minutes.
But feel free to join! A new infomercial starts in 12 minutes.
Exactly. Stay back and unsubscribe from her
I think about him when I masturbate so I guess you could call it love
He surprised me with a puppy tail butt plug in his ass and wants me to fuck him
After we fucked we sat in bed and watched Charlie St. Cloud and he fed me ice cream. It was probably the most romantic thing I've ever done.
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