I'm going to email her once I get off the bathroom floor
yea im pretty sure it has something do with my love of forearms...
I held a cracker & gaterade down for an hour. I feel like this will be my greatest accomplishment of the day.
No, listening to the fray and drinking a bottle of jack daniels does not count as counseling
Bonus points if someone shits their pants. Only 1/2 bonus points if it's you
Bonus points are bonus points regardless
I wish your snatch was here
If my snatch could sprout wings I'd fly to you
lets talk about you, dubstep, and a bunny suit.
As I was puking, these 2 guys started peeing next to me chanting me on
I work 80 hours a week to prevent myself from just laying in bed and masturbating all day. It's a hands off strategy.
Sometimes I refuse to go through a door until someone holds it open for me because I'm a fucking lady.
I had to google some of the kinky sex shit she was telling me she was into.
If that is not a reason to propose to her then I don't know what is
I just choked eating whip cream from the can, and peed a little because I was coughing so hard. How am I still single.
Just took an Adderall with Pedialyte so I think that's a valid answer to "how are you doing"
I'm making a will, in it I'm leaving you my skull.
She just kept screaming and saying "fucking you is like fucking a mountain"
Randomize
